comatose in the toilet

the gambit in the spotlight. scared off the streetlights. comatose in the toilet. on the bowls edge. spewing my guts out. laughing anguish. stripped with the turpentine. the stomach lining disappears. the black fingers scribbling on your soul. away.

the subway is a riot act. a murky acid beaker. stables of dark horses with no golden manes. i am the black swan. wading to the top. peering for the last air. can i get it? opium opus. careless indecision. sticking out just for the rest. the black fingers tear you life away. you have no say.

house of cards ready to fall. i huff and i puff hard. my static panic. on the station, worms wimper. the black fingers tear me away.

frightened of dying out like the dinosaurs. got not release. pen on my paper sucks down the plughole. gaping wrists, where those iron chains were. gripping and rapping out. i waste. black fingers sparing your soul. deleted when you become inconvinent.

i am nothing but a puppet. a lighthouse keepers toy. a rattle in a cage. comatose in the toilet. flushing my soul along with the fecies and urine. left to just bang the doors. scream at injections. wipe my skin off foreign articles. blow dry my hands. leave it all. then behold the sequel.

if all is a sequel. then is there a part two to all involved. black fingers tearing the pages away. loose leaf, controlled by the rag and bone man. sweet sleep. just forget it all. dream it away. vanilla skies, stargaze, pillow drops of cloud nine. spare a thought for the real self in Africa. black fingers stealing the oppurtionities. away.

moon mall.moon trills.moon pills.moon fall.

sail to the moon. in the arks. perched high and hard against the silk screen sky. the starry dots are painted on. painted by legends who have painted on earth. passed on somewhere. in the void. making this all up here. in this moment. a pipe dream. considering that one of the here has left. without a phone call. a connection. this lack of substance is biting at my veins. aorta crumbling. don't want to say a word. a word i know will again make me ache. into the moon mall. is there therapy here? can i take rest? lick my wounds? get the salt out? the moon trills. its spineless laugh. have i become a joke? a mascot for humilation? just an old company mascot, maybe? take moon pills. will they soothe me into sweet sleep? do they work well? will they significantly risk my health? the moon falls. at this point there are no more questions to be asked. i just need to wake up.

on sunday ring road supermarket

the ring road. the cupboards have become bare. replacement of items that have dissappeared completely is the order of the day. scan thy barcode. scream thy numbers. price check in aisle 9. parents with out of control siblings in the same rivalry that this disestablishment has been built on. shelved. schizophrenia. decaffeinated. fat free. no preservatives. all will perish at the first sign of alzhemiers disease. juniors train and are robbed blindly by a suited man. the man thinks that this is the life. the carriage way to the heavens. robed aboved the rest seemingly looking down from a tower. leashing out the bargains. lures. traps. this is entrapment. tricks of the trade. it was a change in the way of doing business. dance you sucker. dance you sucker. latched on to the bait. now someones puppet. to be contorted. set into unwanted motions. made to feel the emptiest of feelings when missing out on the major product in everyones cupboards. get me out of here. the bleary scanners send me into deja vu. constantly it seems i get eaten alive. the innuendo. the omnipresence. the layered thought. a theme reoccuring. it seems that all around me have ulterior motives. plotting towards my demise. the fall would not be that flash. fly buys. for sale. specials. per the kilo. per the gram. inch by inch worshipping in aisles. disarray. dismay and a hell that is here on earth. a clone? a clone? a clone? a clone? a clone? another and another. everywhere around. to spread. everything in its right place. ready made to ensure that we are healthier. fitter. happier and more productive. like a pig in a cage on anti-biotics.

fog (again)

back in the same place. what is happening? groundhog day? everything is same. just dull as it was yesterday. why? who knows a secret to change everything everyday? making each day brighter than the other by doing more and more insane things. i don't know that this exists. well it is worth the everlasting dream. is it? but just tell yourself today when i wake up i am just getting so much better. waking with the new and improved you. if this sounds like a late night skin care commercial is because it is and i am endorsing a product. the product is called life. what? becoming stranded in a row boat. can i find my way back? is it my destiny? what is that anyway? but a fog (again) from the cracks in the concrete city. from the sewers, stench. a little liars instigating fights. living in a nirvana that is not peaceful. a lull that is the storm. want to become a test tube item. please make this happen. i am waiting in the catacombs with a smile and a gift card to the first who gives me that. oh no? oh no! emphasis placed in the wrong places. maybe it would be better if i just declared i am citizen insane and threw my bombshell at passing trains.

aidos amigos. a man being erased. on the sign out or in your terms signing off. (thought i was leaving heh!) tricked, i ain't going anywhere. going to drag you down with me. as i am sick and twisted.

house of cards (24 hour video retirement) - (sleepy willow)

there is a house of cards ready to fall. why? as 24/7 there is a scheme. failed but the subject will continue to pursue the everlasting dream. that of non-existance. shifting through channels with a remote. what will i find? oh look evangelists. that time of morning or night pending on the way you look at it. all i know is that i am tired. droopy eyed. but caffeine seizures stop me from pursuing dreams. again. falter. just want to create a pseudo reality. damn not again. pseudo. pseudo. pseudo. i am becoming a trend. predicatble and lollipop. oh no candy rots the teeth. dentures inevitable if i don't visit the dentist. but to get those i must. lost cause. smiling with gaps on a freeway to hell. what? why? how? mmmmmmmmmeh! want to be free like a pig. rolling in own filth. crackling for the ovens of the world. maybe one day. after naieve post modernism, the next ice age (as i will adapt), will i become this. faith, oh no i am proving populist and conforming to national standards.

morning has aborted

seems that everything is quiet now.

the sense that everything is in its right place is upon me. little do i know that there is a bugs a lurking through the sinew. alerted to their presence i stalk a patrol area. dimmed by acceptance speeches for critical acclaims. electric chair is purchased to mass produce a last supper. diarrohea. giarda and cyrptosporidium. squirmers in the stomach. the outcome does not look too well. believe that a hallmark card that comes across my desk is true, naieve, naieve, am i? the message that is carbon copied. shifted through hands like aid packages. but so disrupting. am i sentimentally handicapped? but sentiment always just ends up drivel. it is just useless. wastes a lot of time. time which could be spent down other avenues. avenues that bend in a suprising fashion. a fashion that gains you kudos. but fashion is garble. maple syrup on corn flakes. yes i said it. held to account. how will i ever make the repayments on the house. for sure this time it will be repossesed. what will i tell the wife and kids sitting in the lounge engaged in sesame seeded conversation. i will stop this pregnancy of these paws. like morning it will be aborted. i will never let it get to this. won't let it happen to my children. amen to that. settle down electric deer, the prices are settled.